Musings on Suicide and all its untold stories ! Life cut short by a moment !! the undying effect of Sushant Singh Rajput’s Suicide !!! Nepotism in Bollywood !!!

These thoughts are there with me for the past few days. Sushant Singh Rajput the cute hero of Kai po che, MS Dhoni and Chhichore, the one with the impish smile committed suicide a week ago on Sunday morning in the middle of Corona virus pandemic and lockdown. Why does his going away create such a big controversy and something that refuses to die down. Why has it impacted so many of us in a way that looks like a personal loss. This year we had a few high profile movie stars who died .. Rishi Kapoor, Irfann Khan and now Sushant Kapoor. Rishi Kapoor died an old man after battling cancer, Irfann khan as a middle aged man after batlling brain tumor both these deaths were sad but understandable simply because we all have lost loved one through desease or old age. Suicide is always the big shocker whether it happens in personal life or public life.

Two of the earliest deaths that I remember is for a classmate who died when we were in 8^th or 9^th standard due to congenital heart disease and a cousin brother who died in a railway accident when I was 15 years old. I have a very vague memory of my classmate but I think my cousins dead body left a very deep impact in my mind probably because that was my first experience of a dead body. Once I came back from crematorium, my own body felt very different, in a way distant and different from my own self if was a deep profound moment that lasted for a short time though. But even then I never had an experience of Suicide which was personally felt.

So the first time, the thought of doing it came in my head it was scary. Over 10 years ago, I was going through a particularly difficult period in my life where all my personal beliefs were shattered. I felt I was alone and that whatever path I choose will lead to further unhappiness and chaos for me. It feels like you are stuck in a situation which has no escape and the only escape seems like killing yourself however dishonourable it might sound. However, since I didn’t take that path it is most likely my despair was most likely not as great or my mind was still able to talk me out of it. I have not shared it with anyone till now and this medium gives me a great anonymity to share it. But even now I cannot share the full details because it is very embarrassing and will affect people who are still in my life. But most of all, we fear telling some dark secrets we tell no one because we fear what will unravel once you start, how the process of sharing that dark secret will change who you are. Its like jumping into an abyss very similar to the abyss that you came out of when you were contemplating suicide. Its like the gate of a nether world that you know exists but you don’t want to go because after you pass through it, nothing that you have in this world will remain the same.

Sushant’s was a household name due to mostly Pavitra Rishta aTV soap, MS dhoni a biopic and Chhicchore a movie on Suicide ( irony). But he was not the most popular movie star or the most handsome. But there is something about his story that connects with us all at different Level. I will like to understand each layer

·        He was from Bihar which was and is a little backward in terms of material wealth and culturally when compared with other states – This lets the poor and disenfranchised to identify themselves with him and adopt him as their own.

·        He was a good student and joined prestigious college for his engineering – Studies are very important for Indians in general and anybody who does well in studies, goes to prestigious schools and colleges is seen in a positive light for the rest of his life. This is so true even in corporate world that after a lifetime of service and great achievements when you are being assessed for new job that “degree” and “institute” becomes a key criteria for selection. Sushant was a good boy in every Indians book because of his studies. And when you juxtapose his studies with other stars in the movie industry then the difference becomes more stark because most of these stars cannot pass class 12^th to save their skin. I think this was also the reason for his not able to adapt himself to fit in their crowd which in turn forever branded him as an outsider.  

·        He belonged to a Middle class family with parents insisting on his becoming engineer – this makes him relatable to a large chunk of middle class population. It is a very middle class trait to have ambition and go after it with nothing but hard work and talent. The fact that he managed not once but twice over (engineering and then movies) makes him very likeable to the middle class people of India

·        He broke the glass ceiling in an industry famous for nepotism and politicking – This lets almost all working class people relate to him who have faced nepotism and politicking at work place. His death also became a torch bearer for people who were against the ruling clique in Bollywood now. So there are powerful forces letting his suicide simmer in public memory, just like there are powerful forces out to malign him after his death.

·        His personality was such that he seemed like a good human, with his good look and raw talent – a likeable person committing suicide is always a bigger news that the death of person people didn’t like too much

·        HIS JOURNEY - I think the thing a lot of people related most was His Journey – His journey was the stuff of dreams. We all think we have come from middle class or poor background, we want to do well in our studies, we want to chase our dream, we want to get rich and famous.. atleast most of us want to do. HE did it all. He left his home for passion, he worked hard, he achieved success and then he was cut to size by people who were jealous of his intelligence, success and his attitude to not be browbeaten. A lot of us have felt this in our life.. relatable? You bet.  And that’s what impacts us all the most. His story is our story

  

Now that he has gone, there are so many skeletons coming out of closet. This is a homegrown trend and hence this will have much more traction that “me too” movement which was basically copied from Hollywood and started by US import called Tanushree Dutta. We have some people like Kangana Ranaut who started the blame of Nepotism on Karan Johar, who has come out openly and named people like KJO, Adi Chopra, Sajid Nadiadwala, Mahesh & Mukesh Bhatt, Balaji Telefilm, Bhushan kumar from T series, Vidhu Vinod Chopra, Anil Kapoor family, Akhtar Family and Salman Khan familyof boycotting Sushant and pushing him to the brink of Suicide. There is truth in what she is saying but very smartly she is doing it at an opportune moment for her. Sushant was socially boycotted by this Cabal (an interesting fact about this CABAL is that almost all of them come from around Peshawar area of Pakistan.. Is this a coincidence?) and as a movie star Kangana was aware of this but she chose to stay quiet and never reached out to Sushant to help him. Now that there is already a big hue and cry by general public she has become very vocal and belligerent. We now have many comments from other celebrity who have shared there two bits. So on one side there is the Cabal which is all powerful and has the backing from powerful forces including mafia ? but on other side is also a set of players who were very scared to come out but are now showing themselves bit by bit:  Vivek Oberoi, Kangana, Shekhar Kapur, Sonu Nigam, Abhijeet Bhattacharjee, Arijit Singh, Anubhav Kashyap etc who are now slowly coming out and naming names. The difference is Cabal team is taking action to increase its power and dominance but the opposition team is saying things to bring them down. The is a wrong tactic from opposition, they should focus on building a team that can dominate and work towards controlling the narrative. There are many fencesitters who are willing to join this team like Prasoon Joshi, Anupam Kher, Paresh Rawal, Ronny Screwwala etc and then there are opportunistic people who will surely join once they get momentum like Bacchhan Family, Part of Kapoor family, Ayushman Khurrana etc.

Cabal team first tried to blame Sushant for his suicide which is partly true. But this doesn’t work for long because Sushant paid dearly for his weakness and hence public did not buy this for long. Then they started a campaign to tell people to grieve in private and let Sushant move on in peace. This also backfired because committing suicide is not normal and nobody in his senses will believe that anybody who commits suicide does so in peace. I think the best option for CABAL is to hold ground and keep quiet. Within a few days the public will forget this brouhaha and move on to the new sensational news. That’s is the time to start working diligently to undermine these voices that have spoken out against them. Like they did to Abhijeet Bhattacharjee, one of the best voices of 90;s , he was shunted out without anybody knowing what happened to him. The more opposition brings out new facts and new names the less focussed it will be on Sushant and easier it will be for Cabal to influence public sentiment. That’s how this will unfold.

Nepotism in Bollywood has always been there, the difference is that the people doing nepotism now are doing it together rather than individually. The other difference is that in a regular nepotism the cabal gets together to decide who will benefit and whom they will work with. In today’s Bollywood they are also deciding whom they will NOT work with. But if you think Nepotism in Bollywood is bad try going to Hyderabad and see the Telegu industry its even worse. Nobody should have this right in any industry as to decide who can come in their industry and who cannot. If something like this happen the government has a duty to come in and stop the monopolies and restrictive industry practice.